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Malik

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Malik, I can tell that you did your research and worked hard to piece your essay together! I enjoyed reading what you have! Nice job! Unfortunately, it also feels like it cuts off abruptly and doesn't reach a resolve.

I would like it if you could put a little more time into editing this and submit for a regrade. Please see the notes on your grading rubric and access your essay at https://ha.cool to continue to work on it. Email me at ereichel@philasd.org when you have completed your revised version, and I will regrade it. Please do this by 3/29.

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Proficiency Scores

Click a standard to read more.

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You're starting to include more information in your writing, which is a good start! Keep adding more details to help your readers understand your topic better.

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Your writing is becoming more organized, which is a positive step! Keep experimenting with different ways to structure your ideas for maximum clarity.

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Your writing paints some pictures, though it can be hard to understand sometimes. Keep practicing to make it clearer!

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Your grammar skills are getting better, with just a few small errors. Keep practicing to improve even more!

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You're pretty good at mixing up your sentence styles to keep things interesting. Keep trying different ways to write!

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You're starting to include context in your stories, which is pretty good! Keep adding more details to make your stories richer.

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You're getting better at staying on topic, but sometimes you still go off track.

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Hone your grammar skills by practicing consistent application of grammar rules to enhance readability.

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Enhance your descriptive language by adding more vivid and relevant details to captivate your reader's imagination.

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Sharpen your writing's purpose to ensure your message is explicit and focused, guiding your reader through your narrative.

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Why?

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How?

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Reach!

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Stretch!

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My Scores

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1

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